"When You're A Jet" - A History Of John Kerry, Vol. 1

Before you cast your vote for John Forbes Kerry, there are a couple of things you should know. Open your arms and minds to my racist, republican propaganda for a few moments (the following quotes are taken from C-Span's website. I would advise you to visit and read Mr. Kerry's testimony for yourself.):

In 1971, John Kerry testified before the Senate Foreign Relations Committee, mostly in regards to atrocities committed by American soldiers in Viet Nam. The Testimony was presided over by Senator William Fulbright (Democrat, creator of the Fulbright scholarship and staunch segregationist who voted against the Civil Rights Act of 1964). After questioning John Kerry, Senator Claiborne Pell (Democrat, after whom the Pell Grant is named) remarked: "As the witness knows, I have a very high personal regard for him and hope before his life ends he will be a colleague of ours in this body."

So, from Senator Pell's comment, one could gather that a place at the table was already being prepared for John Kerry. Let us not forget that Mr. Kerry's tour of duty lasted four months, as his third Purple Heart enabled him to return home early. Let us also not forget that it is Senator Kerry who has garnered more citations in a shorter span of time than any other American soldier. Apparently, his experiences taught him that the best way to send soldiers into war is with baskets filled with daisies, and for battles to be fought in a manner recalling the Jets and Sharks from "West Side Story", joyous frivolity resulting in maybe, one casualty, as the troops Bob Fosse their way to victory. Further, be warned, the responsibility for the barbarity of war lies solely with you, consumer:

"My feeling, Senator, on Lieutenant Calley is what he did (the My Lai Massacre, aka Abu Ghraib, Sr.) quite obviously was a horrible, horrible, horrible thing and I have no bone to pick with the fact that he was prosecuted. But I think that in this question you have to separate guilt from responsibility, and I think clearly the responsibility for what has happened there lies elsewhere.

I think it lies with the men who designed free fire zones. I think it lies with the men who encourage body counts. I think it lies in large part with this country, which allows a young child before he reaches the age of 14 to see 12,500 deaths on television, which glorifies the John Wayne syndrome, which puts out fighting man comic books on the stands, which allows us in training to do calisthenics to four counts, on the fourth count of which we stand up and shout "kill" in unison, which has posters in barracks in this country with a crucified Vietnamese, blood on him, and underneath it says "kill the gook," and I think that clearly the responsibility for all of this is what has produced this horrible aberration."

John Kerry also seemed to feel that Communism was no longer a threat to America, although we barely emerged unscathed from the Cuban Missle Crisis less than ten years earlier:

"I think it is ridiculous to assume we have to play this power game based on total warfare. I think there will be guerilla wars and I think we must have a capability to fight those. And we may have to fight them somewhere based on legitimate threats and that is what I would say to this question of world peace. I think it is bogus, totally artificial. There is no threat. The Communists are not about to take over our McDonald hamburger stands. (Laughter)

And he would know. After all, John Kerry met with Viet Cong officials in violation of something called U.S. Code 18 U.S.C. 953, which states that it is illegal for a U.S. citizen to venture abroad and negotiate with foreign powers. Quoting Linda Chavez: "Under questioning from the Committee, Kerry referred to the democratically-elected government of South Vietnam — our allies — as a "dictatorial regime, the Thieu-Ky-Khiem regime," while respectfully calling the North Vietnamese communist regime we were fighting by its oxymoronic official name, the Democratic Republic of Vietnam, and the murderous Viet Cong's political arm by their preferred "Provisional Revolutionary Government."

And Senator Kerry's communist Vietnamese counterparts undoubtedly have fond memories of him as well.

Stay tuned for Vol. 2, which will provide a glimpse into the younger days of the junior Senator from Massachusetts and candidate for Chairman President, of these soon to be defunct United States of America.